I had a serious minor breakdown last night. I was in the kitchen, trying to find the lids to what's left of the glass containers that DH's co-worker hasn't stolen out of the fridge at work (grrrr) and I just couldn't take trying to find them in those crappy corner cabinets I can barely reach into... I let it rip on DH. Bad. I started crying about how I was going to be stuck the rest of my life living in a crappy house built for a single drunk man (I swear it is, no family can function in this place normally) stuck in a state I don't want to be in, with him in a job he hates.
I told you I let it rip.
After I calmed down, I think the depression hit me even worse for a few hours. I've spent most of the last couple of years in limbo - waiting to get out of here, and I'm really not sure how much longer I can handle it. About two years after we got married, we were walking downtown Seattle and I came across a psychics place - for ten dollars she'd answer two questions. I could not resist. So I asked two questions: one, how about the kid situation? (Two, a girl and a boy - that's why I don't give up on #2, even though I'd actually like another girl. LOL) And two, when would we move back to Texas... she said 6 to 7 years. If this person was right, we'd just about be on par with that if we move next year... and yes, I've been clinging to that the last couple of years.
When I say I'm willing to live out of a tent if I have to, as long as we have the land, you know I'm serious! No woman in her right mind would contemplate living that long without running hot water! ;) I'm just tired of having crappy neighbors (including that sex offender down the road), tired of not being able to have chickens thanks to our HOA, and frankly, tired of this house which I can't function in. Buying a house that needed major rehab is a good idea when you're childless, or have a lot of free time... neither of which is us at these days. About the only thing that could save it is gutting the whole house... and considering it's officially worth less than what it was when we bought it - even with the improvements we did! - I don't think it's worth our time anymore. The whole master bedroom floor still needs ripped up and rebuilt. Now the bathroom floor is getting pretty bad too - and I don't even want to think about how much work that room will be.
I really wish I had never been talked out of my original idea to purchase a small, older RV when we first moved here. Things would have been a little cheaper, and maybe we wouldn't have racked up so much debt trying to stay afloat in this state. We keep chipping away at that debt, hopefully it will continue to go down instead of us having a major crisis about six months into getting it down like usual. (knock on wood)
I'd say maybe it's time to find that psychic again... but these days, I'm too cheap. Oh, and I don't want to know. We'll get out of here eventually... if I have to live in the tent with no hot water. Bring it on! ;) I'll do anything but live with my inlaws.... that's just pushing it. LOL
This is a sponsored post brought to you by the folks over at free psychic chat but all thoughts are (rather unfortunately lol) my own. Mami needs a vacation, stat. Maybe I should ask them if a vacation is in the cards this time?
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
Oh dear! I did not know if I should laugh or cry for you! Sounds like life has been a few challenges too many these last few years!
Just a thought...you know what you have, you do not know what you might get!
Hang in there! There is a reason for all things in life!
God bless,
Sounds rough. Have you ever read Mary Hunt's books/blog/column? Sensible advice.
Hang in there! You know, I know a couple ladies who bought a parcel of land, moved onto it with a trailer and built the house themselves bit by bit whenever they had money for the supplies. It took a few years for them to get the house the way they wanted it, but they didn't seem to mind. A bare piece of land is probably cheaper than a house, and no HOA to tell you what to do!
I really liked your blog but sadly I must unsubscribe. Your always bashing washington state.It's a beautiful state, everything is only a few hours away, mountains, lakes, rivers and beaches. I'm sorry you hate washington state, I happen to love living here, hopefully you can move back to texas soon.
Noelle: Yes, I know - the grass does always seem greener on the other side, doesn't it?
Anon#1: I have. Our problem is unfortunately not budgeting, but getting dinged with unexpected high bills that once we seem to start recovering from, get dinged with something else. For instance, we paid cash for the truck, which drained our savings, only to get hit with my very unexpected medical bills.
Ruth: I'm shocked at how high land can be, even without a house! Some areas seem very cheap, but then there might be no water available, or no jobs. I could do a trailer just fine if I find the right deal!
Anon: It's beautiful here, I completely agree, but VERY expensive. At one point a few weeks ago, gas was 60 cents higher here in WA than back in TX! This is what got us into trouble financially - trying to stay afloat in a state we can't afford. I also have to disagree about things being close - maybe if you can afford to take the ferry, but we can't. It's over an hour just to get to Seattle, 45 minutes to get to Tacoma for us - and there are still tolls to be paid. I'm sorry to see you go, but that is your choice.
Post a Comment