Helping Kids After A Disaster

The slightest disaster event can be incredibly traumatizing to most children: from the loss of their favorite toy(s) to the possible loss of loved ones and pets. Their whole world can be upturned in the blink of an eye, and it's important to remember that as hard as it is for us adults to cope, it can be even harder to kids to understand what just happened. While you might be struggling to deal with insurance agents, funeral arrangements, etc, you need to immediately take a moment to assure your child(ren) that you and any loved ones will be right there to be with them. Don't make any promises at this moment that you cannot keep, because kids WILL remember this, and it could end up hurting them even worse.

As soon as possible from the event - be it a fire, tornado, etc - try to get back into their former routines as quickly as possible and keep a regular schedule. Even if you're staying a hotel while waiting to get back to your home, stick to regular bedtimes and naps to make sure kids are getting enough rest. If you're away from your home, it is usually easier to eat out a lot, but still try to make sure they (and you!) are eating healthy. The more stressed a child is, the easier it is for them to fall ill. If you're noticing signs of fever or sickness, remember that it could be caused by the stress, but still try to get them in to see a doctor or physician as soon as possible. If you've just gone through something such as a tornado or fire, remember that there are many chemicals and toxic items that could have been in the air and gotten into their body, so take these symptoms seriously!

If kids feel that they caused the disaster or the person to die, you need to immediately assure them that it was the opposite. Tell them it's OK to cry, and let them get it out of their system. Encourage them to talk about their feelings! They will need time to grieve - even if it's just for the only home they knew, so don't expect everything to be better the following morning. Older kids will probably be full of questions, but don't be tempted to give more information than your child can handle. Answer all questions honestly, and if you don't know the answer to questions about natural events like hurricanes or tornadoes, you can always turn it into a learning event for all of you.

Above all, keep as calm as you can and remind your child(ren) how much you love them - and don't forget about taking care of YOU doing this time!